Horse jokes, and some news

[pyesetz]

A horse walks into a bar.  The barman says "Why the long face?"  The horse says "As an anthropomorphic horse, I fit in neither with humans nor my own kind, and have thus lived a life of loneliness."

A horse walks into a bar.  The bartender says, "Why the long face?"  The horse says, "Because I'm an alcoholic and it's killing my family."

A horse walks into a bar.  The bartender asks the horse if he's an alcoholic considering all the bars he frequents, to which the horse replies "I think not."  POOF!  The horse disappears.
      This is the point in time when all the philosophy students in the audience begin to giggle, as they are familiar with the philosophical proposition of Cogito ergo sum, or "I think, therefore, I am".
      But to explain the concept beforehand would be putting Descartes before the horse.

A neutrino walks through a bar.

* * * * *

In other news, my mother died on Saturday.  6pm Israel time.  I heard about it five hours later, which was only an hour before the funeral on the other side of the world, so I couldn't possibly attend.  She had been on a respirator and a feeding tube for her last hour of life.

Comments

[pyesetz]

In case anyone's wondering, "Why the long face?" is a question that my mother used to ask me.

[shiver-raccoon.livejournal.com]

I'm really sorry to hear about your mother's passing.

I'm surprised that a funeral would start 6 hours after death; that doesn't give relatives any time to attend, even if they're local! Is this common in Isreal?

[pyesetz]

It is apparently common in Israel to hold the funeral super-quick, so that relatives outside the country cannot possibly be expected to attend.  Otherwise they might feel obligated to spend money they don't have on a super-expensive last-minute airplane ticket.

Israel is a very small country.  It's only 350 km from Haifa to Eilat.  Almost anyone who would want to attend her funeral is probably living in Jerusalem or an adjacent town.

[deffox]

My condolences on losing her.

[pyesetz]

Thanks!  You guys still living in Hamilton?

It seems clear that I am no longer on speaking terms with ducktapeddonkey.  The list of furs who no longer want to talk to me keeps growing, but the list of still-furiends does not.

[deffox]

Yeah, Dakhun and I still live in Hamilton. No longer in the previous apartment.

My social life is pretty quiet nowadays. I went to Furnal Equinox last weekend, but barely talked to anyone.

[porsupah.livejournal.com]

I'm envisaging a Wondermark comic with one character loudly announcing "I HAVE REASON TO DOUBT THAT YOU ARE A PROFESSIONAL COMEDIAN, SIR!" =:)

I'm very sorry to hear of such a terrible loss. I recall the time Dad took ill, with the email of a grave tone, and then a week or two later, that news, in a phone call from the hospital at about 2am.. it's a hell of a lot to take in, even when you're aware things are in a very precarious position. All we can really do is try to remember what they brought to our lives (beside those, literally), and be happy for all of that, ne?

[pyesetz]

All the jokes in this post came from this Reddit thread.

My mother had advanced Alzheimer's.  It was just the empty husk of her body that finally died ten days ago.  I did not speak to her for her last five years because every time I tried, my sister would jump in and try to get money out of me — she refused to believe that I am no longer the well-off brother she had thirty years ago.

When I was three, my mother had our dog put to death for the crime of obeying me (and not her, for the same order).  I never forgave her for that for as long as she lived.

There are very few stories I could tell of my mother being a positive influence on my life.  I suppose I could post them at some point.