pyesetz: (woof)

Recently, the world-famous blogger Pharyngula (who is actually Professor P.Z. Myers of UMinn/Morris) noted that the president was running an online survey, so he asked his minions to screw it up by choosing their answers to "go against the result the poll is engineered to generate".  I generally like Pharyngula, although he is sometimes too willing to conflate "scientifically proven" with "true".  (Newton's laws were scientifically proven for over 300 years, but they were false the entire time.  F = m⋅a is a statement about the universe that you can only "prove" if your equipment isn't very precise.)

So anyway, I clicked on the link to the poll, even though it seems politically incorrect to visit a page that has "DonaldJTrump" right there in its URL.  Oh noes — my address bar is displaying Voldemort's name!  But really, the poll isn't so bad, if you are willing to let the president speak his own icky Republican language.

The poll asks 25 questions, for 13 of which I am able to give the answers that The Donald wanted to evoke.  That's over half!  Maybe this guy isn't so bad.  I suppose it's time for me to bore you with my rundown on his poll.

Read more... )

In other news, Craig Deare has lost his job at the National Security Council and returned to his previous job of Dean of Administration at the National Defense University (née the National War College).  Deare had to go because he is an expert on Mexico and Trump doesn't want to hear opinions that disagree with his own — and Deare couldn't keep his mouth shut about that, which was fatal.  Now *this* is the Trump Administration that I was expecting!  It doesn't matter that Trump's initial cabinet is the "worstest ever" because many of these people will not last long on the executive payroll.
pyesetz: (spirograph)
"Fox News offered former anchor Gretchen Carlson 20 million dollars and an apology after she spent years being sexually harassed by Roger Ailes, who looks like they tried to clone Alfred Hitchcock but the DNA was incomplete so they just filled it in with genetic material from a Basset hound, mashed potatoes, and the mumps, which they then stirred around in a Waffle House toilet after the toilet had just looked at the Ark of the Covenant."

---Chris Hardwick, host of @Midnight

(via)
pyesetz: (flag-over-sunrise)
Berin Greenbear quotes from futurist Douglas Coupland's essay in the Globe&Mail, which I actually read at their website before seeing this reference.  I didn't like it when I first saw it and I still don't.  A "pessimist" is supposed to be a realist, but a "radical pessimist" is apparently someone who sees every glass as half-empty no matter how full it is.

1) It's going to get worse
It is always getting worse for some people, better for others.  The important questions are "what is happening to the average person" and "what is happening to me personally".

4)Move to Vancouver, San Diego, Shannon or Liverpool
Overpriced real estate.  Yeah, weather's nice, but not nice enough for those prices.  Anyway, that's where the author of this screed lives, so at least he's taking his own advice.

5) You'll spend a lot of your time feeling like a dog leashed to a pole outside the grocery store – separation anxiety will become your permanent state
I doubt it.  I don't even have a cell phone!

6) The middle class is over. It's not coming back
That's what the rich folks *want* you to think...

7) Retail will start to resemble Mexican drugstores
Absurd.  There is no need to go to a Mexican drugstore if you can get the same products online!  The value of a brick-and-mortar store is being able to examine the products before purchase.  This is another "what rich folks *want* you to think" item.

10) In the same way you can never go backward to a slower computer, you can never go backward to a lessened state of connectedness
I enjoy retro computing.
Read more... )
pyesetz: (Default)
We're rascals, scoundrels, villains, and knaves,
We're devils and black sheep, really bad eggs,
We're beggars and blighters, ne'er-do-well cads,
Aye, but we're loved by our mommies and dads,...


This is amusing only if you think piracy belongs in history books like knights in shining armour.  Wearing an eyepatch and pretending to have a pegleg doesn't make you a pirate.  Downloading music off the web doesn't make you a pirate.  To be a pirate, you must be willing to kill anyone who gets in your way.  In the year 2000, at least 15 people were killed by pirates.  Piracy remains a modern-day scourge in Malaysia, Indonesia, and Singapore.

In 2003, there was this typical event:
While underway, several armed uniformed men suspected to be GAM rebels in a fishing boat hijacked the fishing trawler and sailed it towards Indonesian waters, where Indonesian Marine Police confronted them. A shootout ensued in which two of the suspected GAM members on board the trawler were shot dead and another was injured. Several others in the boat escaped. The crew of the trawler and the suspected GAM members were taken for investigation.

and also this one:
While underway, several pirates in three fishing boats fired on the ship from both sides, and forced the master to stop engine. The Master sent a distress message. Pirates boarded the ship and gathered all crew on deck. They took hostage the master, chief officer and chief engineer and took them off the ship. The third officer reported to the Indonesian Navy. A Navy boat arrived and escorted the ship to Belawan anchorage. Hostages were subsequently released upon payment of ransom.

Citation.

(This actually has something to do with the missing "August 6th" entry in my Mass. trip report series.)
pyesetz: (Default)
I think this is funny.  And I got the link from this guy.
pyesetz: (Default)
This is funny: a guy demanding that DailyKos ban certain overused words.  Note that the post is tagged "snark"—the poster would be astonished if his demand were acceded to.  Many of the comments are funnier than the original post, such as
pyesetz: (Default)
Here.  Yep, there I am, on the frontpage, talking about Ted Haggard and Mark Foley.  Sometimes there's just no telling what will turn out to be popular.  If I'd known that post would have legs, I would have mentioned Rick Santorum and his fixation on man-dog sex.

If you're late to the party and my post has fallen off the frontpage, look here

Update: My post at dK about my post at SP has so far received 30% "self-indulgent", 10% "lacking in substance", 2% "doesn't help Democrats", and 57% "pie".  Pie wins by a majority!
pyesetz: (Default)
I've gotten past [livejournal.com profile] brad's lameness filter!  And this was only my second attempt!

Alexa says my website is one of the top 33 destinations on Furtopia!  And [livejournal.com profile] loganberrybunny is only three times as popular as I am.  But Technorati claims that nobody who matters ever links to my journal— so why do they even mention me?

I've been working on taxes this week and haven't been doing daily upkeep on my logfile.  Ugh!  Now I have 275 new visitor-IP's to catalogue.  There are actually some interesting hits besides the usual pedo-search trash.  CYD is talking about me again.  Looks like they're happy with the comments my friends made about them in this post.  Hey, Donotsue, here's another mention of your name for the next time you go ego-surfing!

My monograph on search-engine users seems to be having quite an effect.  First off, it's a link-fest.  When people search for "pedophilia" they now tend to land on the "search-engine users" page instead of the more specific page for their search—and often as not they end up clicking on something off-topic like Who needs backups?.  But (perhaps coincidentally) Google seems to be ranking all of my pages higher now.  I'm getting quite a few hits from people searching for stuff like "ip city lookup free php code".  I can't explain why there's a sudden burst of interest in that field, other than that there's always been interest but suddenly my page is on the first screenful of search-hits.  My copy of John Downey's I18N_UnicodeString.php actually ranks only slightly lower (29 vs 24) than the author's official copy, for queries like "PHP Unicode storing".  I don't know why people would skip past his to click on my copy of the same thing.

I am just starting to get the barest inkling of the mind-boggling scale of Internet usage, which reminds me of AT&T's "Spaceship Earth" ride at Disney.  Hopefully I'll never get the kind of email that Wil Wheaton has to deal with.

This quiz says I act like I'm only 33 years old.  Ah, would that I were so young again!  And this quiz predicts that I will die at age 79.  I doubt it—neither my father nor my grandfathers lived that long, although some great-grandfathers did.

You Are Creepy
Creepy!
Serial killers would run away from you in a flash.

pyesetz: (Default)
My dog (we'll call him "Walnut") is a West Highland Terrier.  Here is a old picture of him as a young puppy.  He is very, very fast.  In puppy-training classes he beat all the other dogs at "race to the treat".  When he races with kid #2, the boy runs straight to the finish line while Walnut prances all over the yard—and still beats him in the end!

Some years we have a rabbit family living under our shed.  It seems 2005 is one of those years.  Walnut is a digging dog, so yesterday he dug himself into the rabbit hole, but didn't find anything.  Then a rabbit came into the yard, so Walnut decided to chase a rabbit for his very first time.  They were almost evenly matched, but as the chase continued Walnut continued to get ever closer.  Anthro rabbits might not want to click here )
pyesetz: (Default)
*edited* To reduce the smear on all government officials

This post is for [livejournal.com profile] camstone, who is apparently waiting for me to say something bad about him as a guy-who-unfriended-me.  Sorry, Cam, I reserve my hate for your fascist boss, El Presidente, and the party elite who egg him on.  I'm sorry to learn that you support Republican policy on the matter at hand, a policy that agrees with al-Qaida (and not with our nation's founders) about how governments should deal with thoughtcrimers like furries and pedos.

My essay was aimed at pedophiles (who commit thought crimes), not child-rapists (who are the scum of the Earth).  Your refusal to separate these categories makes reasoned argument impossible.  I sent a link showing that pedophilia is untreatable, you reply with a link claiming that child-rape urges can be suppressed.  I say pedophilia is a political issue, you reply that child-rape is a moral issue.  We are just talking past each other so we might was well stop.

I would pray for Hashem to help you find a way to remove your blinders on this issue, but I'm not into the "praying for others" scene.  God can't help you unless you let Him.  I believe that I am working to spread Truth and Justice while you are working for Satan.  I suppose the feeling is mutual.
pyesetz: (mr_peabody)
Grruwlf!  Snoop-Dog here, again setting the Wayback Machine for: time = "Fall 2004" and place = "my website's logfile".  Today's topic is The Search-Engine Users.  This time I shall organize the data according to how I felt when I saw these search-queries in my logfile.  The porn-links are in section "Disgusted".

My logfile shows 318 entries whose referers are search-engine users, with 237 distinct search-queries, some of which I've combined into near-synonymous groups.  For example, it seems to me that someone searching for  "M/F furry" and someone who wants "M/F yiff" are probably looking for the same pages on the web.  I use the notation [5×] to indicate that there are four other queries similar to the one shown.

There are 729 logfile entries from the engines themselves, stopping by to keep their databases current, which is more than twice the number of hits from actual users.  In part this is my fault for not putting "Expiry" headers on the output from my .PHP programs.  That causes some engines to reread the files multiple times per week even though they don't change for months at a time.  Problem is, I can't decide what expiry time I should use.  This person recommends 48 hours for HTML files, which seems too short.

Happy, Sad, Quizzical, Cynical, Angry, Disgusted )
 )
pyesetz: (Default)
Here is a thread on CrushYiffDestroy.com about my Pedophilia essay.  Clearly the CYD folks are much classier trolls than the SomethingAwful goons.  Hi, [livejournal.com profile] jinx_mouse!

Replying to trolls again )
pyesetz: (mr_peabody)
Grruwlf!  I'm Snoop-dog,¹ your friendly neighborhood troll.  This post is the first in what may become an occasional series on the topic of website logfile analysis.  No, wait!  It isn't *that* boring!  In fact, it's far more interesting than watching grass grow, waiting for a pot of water to boil, etc.
 
¹Yes, it seems I've acquired a new nickname.  Begone, PieSplatz!  Thou art *so* 2004!

My logfile contains 6,393 entries for the period 14-Sep-04 through 31-Dec-04.  Eliminating duplicative entries reduces the total to about 4,206 accesses.  I got hits from 1,237 different IP addresses, which I've grouped into perhaps 738 distinct people visiting my website.  I've managed to find names for only 49 of these people, but those named visitors were responsible for 44.6% of all the accesses.  Interesting search-queries that have brought people to my site include "pheromone cockroach starve male", "eating deer organ meats", "dog humping cookie monster", "children having sex pedo crimes frequency......  *snore zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz*

Huh?  Oh, sorry.  Must have dozed off!  Today's topic is the "LJ image leeches".  These are induhviduals who like to look at just the pictures embedded in public LiveJournal posts, while ignoring the surrounding text.  During Q4 of 2004 I made four public-posts-with-pictures and captured website hits from 112 of these, um, "people" I suppose you could call them.  Or they could be called "bandwidth-sucking sex-starved pimply-faced adult-wannabe waste products", but that would be unfair to the ones without acne.  So here is what I have learned about them:

Boring analysis of least-desirable visitors to a website that ISN'T EVEN YOURS )  )
pyesetz: (Default)
Doomsday is coming soon!  For those who haven't heard, LJ's founder [livejournal.com profile] brad has finally admitted that he did sell out LJ to the MovableType people.  He did this for a very understandable reason—he would rather write computer programs than run a business.  Still, there are some worrisome elements in his announcement.  Let me prime the rumor mill with these between-the-lines implications that I see in his text:
  • The most immediate noticable effect is expected to be that LJ will "get prettier".  This suggests that we will never get the USENET-style interface that many have wanted, as it would divert people from seeing the new glitz and the spamvertisements that Brad says will never come.
  • Paidmember prices are not changing in order not to "anger people unnecessarily".  I predict that the price will go up after six months.
  • The new Terms of Service will be less user-friendly and more lawyer-friendly and you will be prohibited from posting until you agree to them.  This may imply a general clean-up of LJ to be more lawyer-friendly.  Perhaps everyone's favorite communities, like [livejournal.com profile] show_your_cock and [livejournal.com profile] show_your_pussy, will be banned by the lawyers as too legally risky to allow.
  • LJ will be mass-suspending the journals of people who seem to have been lying about their age.  Be sure to back up your journal in case this random scourge gets you!
  • "We feel that there's a lot of synergy between our two companies and we both benefit from this relationship by bringing a lot of value-add to the table.  By focusing on our core competencies we can continue to provide robust, turn-key, industry-leading solutions while also lowering Total Cost of Ownership (TCO) to our valued clients."  Brad claims that this text is "gibberish" but he said it anyway.  What it seems to mean to me is that LJ will be following SixApart's lead in rachetting up prices on their products.
  • New additions to LJ will no longer be open-source.  Future enhancements to LJ will be closed-source.  No one will be able to see all the hacks the FBI will insist that they add in order to track the journals of suspicious persons.  Brad will be insisting (at least for awhile) that the "infrastructure guts" remain open-source, but the new "pretty" software will be hoarded.
So what can you do about this catastrophe?  There are some things you really should do:
  1. Back up your journal!
  2. Back up the comments on your journal!
  3. Back up your user-icons and pictures!
  4. (Paidmembers only) Enable the option that sends you emailed copies of any comments you make on other people's journal.
This has been a public-service announcement.
pyesetz: (Default)
There's a thread on SomethingAwful.com where they make fun of furries who have offspring.  Many of their posts quote from my Sozont story.  I'd like to reply to them, but I refuse to pay $9.95 for the right to post at their website, so I'll just put the comments here.
Yes, I'm replying to trolls here )
pyesetz: (Default)

Thread 1: Dave S. posts often to alt.lifestyle.furry and uses many names: "Dave the Dancing Hyena", "Dave the Rotating Hyena", "Dave the Emperor Palatine Hyena", etc. In this post (on 14-April-2004), I referred to him as "Dave the <adjective> Hyena".

Thread 2: I was told that this topic is an example of how mean the EatAwlFurrees people are. But it didn't seem as mean as I expected, so I looked elsewhere on that site and found some posts by a guy named "Dave the adjective". Is that a coincidence?

Merge: "Dave the adjective" has been a member of EAF since 18-April-2004, the same day that "Dave the Hatfull Hyena" posted a link to EAF on a.l.f. Like Dave the Hyena, "Dave the adjective" is British, thinks Karl Marx is a positive character, and likes snappish comments. Is it really the same person behind both 'nyms? Who cares? This is just idle gossip!

*edit* Still, I like to think that he has adopted a name I gave him.

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