pyesetz: (woof)
(Brown text = post-election edits.)

It’s been almost six years(!) since the last time I linked to the blog of my American friend and colleague, Dr. J.  Gotta cross-link to your homies to keep our Google rankings up!  Anyway, Dr. J works for the US gov’t, so he may be obligated to write political tracts in support of the incoming Stalinist dictator Constitutionally-limited president.  He published this tract on a Sunday, perhaps to hide the fact (if it is one) that he was required to write it on paid government time.  There is a law against that, but it’s widely ignored like most good-government laws in the USA.

The didactic form that Dr. J chose is the “in an alternate universe, Hillary is actually guilty of something” meme, which isn’t bad as propaganda styles go.  Certainly it is less objectionable than the style chosen by Dr. Phil Plait, who basically starts from the reasonable “Global Warming is the most important issue” and the unreasonable ”politicians do not lie” and somehow manages to conclude that Hillary is the best candidate — even though she is pro-WWIII and Donald is against it and the world wars show up as spikes on the historical temperature chart.  So I guess I could perhaps join in on this fun, although personally I endorse Jill Stein because she tells the fewest lies.

Before we begin, I should note that Dr. J’s piece is actually funny, which is probably more than I can hope to achieve with my own work.  His Churchillian grammar reference is excellent and I found myself agreeing with the imaginary crowd furious at Hillary’s misquote.  It’s “shall not”, I say!  Yet even in an alternate universe, it is still the anti-Hillary forces that are correct.

Alternate Universe № ❰∞,∞,∞,26,∞,0,19,∞̅…❱ (see supernatural numbers, which I don’t actually believe in because ∞ is a figment of the mathematical imagination; Objective Reality probably doesn’t contain any numbers larger than around 10⁸⁵ or so).
      Conceit: In this universe (which we can never locate because its ID number is transfinite), Hillary actually had a legitimate reason to operate her honeypot email server that provided live feeds to Russia and Al Qaeda and Goldman Sachs containing the classified info that she received.
      Resulting difference: Not much, really.  The Espionage Act of 1917 says it applies to everyone, including the president.  It does not offer any exemption for politicians who possess a legitimate national-security reason to burn an agent’s cover; if that action results in another agent’s death then the politician is supposed to get the electric chair.  So Hillary Clinton is basically in the same category as Dick Cheney.
Alternate Universe № 5.2761 (but keeping in mind that fractional numbers which are not ratios might not actually exist; they might instead be mere measurement conveniences arising from the enormous gap between human-sized units and physics-sized ones).
      Conceit: In this universe, Hillary actually still has a shred of decency left in her, so she does not make a big deal of Donald’s misogynistic ways.  Because, you know, her husband Bill has done most of the same things — except only Donald dared to talk about it when he knew the mic was on, thus showing that Donald is an idiot.  And Hillary has insisted all along that absolutely nothing Bill has ever done was actually wrong, so therefore (for her) those same things should also not have been wrong when Donald did them.  Donald's contemptible attitude toward women could certainly be criticized by other Democrats (such as Huma Abedin, who divorced her own husband for less) but this would lead to questions about Bill that Hillary doesn't want to hear.
      Resulting difference: None.  It doesn’t matter which acts of muck-raking Hillary decides are beneath her (if any).  Barack Obama has already announced that the winner of the election shall be Hillary.  He has also hinted that if for any reason the vote-counting machines ring up “Donald” as their answer, that could only mean that the machines were hacked by the Russians because the American people do not have permission from their president to vote for Donald.  HeilHillary!  It outta be a crime not to love her!
Alternate Universe № 3141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375110⁴⁹.  (This ratio *might* be the true value of π, if transcendental numbers do not actually exist.  In any event, because our home universe is quantized, there is probably no physical experiment that could ever be performed which would prove that this *isn’t* the true value of π.)
      Conceit: In this universe, Hillary is openly working for Goldman Sachs, the vampire squid that wants to RULE THE WORLD by installing its Manchurian candidates as the leaders of all major governments.  None of the policies she espouses on the campaign trail have anything to do with her actual plans for her presidency, which consist of transferring all remaining wealth from Main St to Wall St while waging a causeless war against Russia in order to bring about the Nuclear Apocalypse, thus ensuring the Second Coming of Jesus Christ among the poor bedraggled survivors on a burnt-out planet.
      Resulting difference: Um, there seems to be a technical glitch in our Inter-Universal Counterfactuality gizmo.  Apparently the ID number for this “alternate universe” is actually a synonym of our own.  Anyway, by the Reflexive Property, there cannot be any difference between two universes that differ only in name and not in character.
pyesetz: (spirograph)
"Fox News offered former anchor Gretchen Carlson 20 million dollars and an apology after she spent years being sexually harassed by Roger Ailes, who looks like they tried to clone Alfred Hitchcock but the DNA was incomplete so they just filled it in with genetic material from a Basset hound, mashed potatoes, and the mumps, which they then stirred around in a Waffle House toilet after the toilet had just looked at the Ark of the Covenant."

---Chris Hardwick, host of @Midnight

pyesetz: (woof)

Thank you for your words.  It's great that you have found a candidate to believe in.  Please enjoy the feeling that there is a candidate out there who actually *deserves* your vote.  But please also do keep in mind the fact that your preferred candidate has feet of clay.

> Please explain to me just one single possible fraudulent criminal act that you think Hillary is guilty of.

Hillary personally accepted a bribe of $675,000 from Goldman Sachs, an enemy of the Free World that some call the vampire squid because of its desire to install Manchurian candidates in most every national government.  The money was supposed to be for “speeches” but Hillary is unable to produce even redacted transcripts for those speeches, nor has anyone come forward to say they attended, likely because the speeches never actually happened.  Of course, Hillary is quite capable of giving actual speeches, so she didn’t *need* to lie about what the money was for, but she lied anyway.  This “cheating for its own sake” seems to be a repeating pattern with her.  Anyway, selling speeches and then not delivering them is fraud, and it is a crime to take a bribe in exchange for protecting banksters from the jail-time that they deserve.

Hillary did not *need* to cheat in order to win Nevada.  She certainly didn’t need to have “her” people, supposedly-neutral party apparachiks, blatantly treat the delegates differently based on whom they were pledged to.  There was no need to bring in police to protect her cronies from the nonexistent violence of those whom they had just wronged.  There was no need for the police to all be dressed in brownshirts, as if the Democratic Party were comprised of Nazis.  There was no actual need for any of this; it was all for show.  “Vote for me because I’m a corrupt politician who cheats and gets away with it.”  There are apparently Republicans who find this behaviour attractive, but I don’t.

Voting in Phoenix was so bad, we cannot know how many delegates Hillary truly deserves.  Hillary could have made a show of tut-tutting the people who did this, insisting that everyone should have the right to get their vote counted in this free country.  Al Gore might have refused to accept the votes of tainted delegates, but Hillary is not Al.

The City of New York is auditing the Board of Elections because it deleted 126,000 people, overweighted with college students, from the party rolls at the last minute, without notice or explanation or reason, apparently for fear that some of them might possibly vote for Bernie.  This is not what one might call “a free and fair election”.  This is just as wrong as when Republicans delete Blacks from the voter rolls for fear that some of them might vote for a Democrat.  Again, Hillary could have made a statement that what happened in NYC was wrong.  She did not.  How many delegates from New York does Hillary actually deserve?  We don’t know, and Hillary seems perfectly okay with that.  I’m not.  This is election-tampering.  It doesn’t matter that Republicans do it too; I expect better of Democrats.  It doesn’t matter that nobody ever goes to jail for it.  Interfering with elections is still a crime.  Did Hillary give the order to delete those voters?  What did she know and when did she know it?  If the USA were a free country, we would have the right to expect an investigation.  Maybe it was the local office acting on their own initiative, hoping to curry favour with the Clinton-leaning national party establishment; or maybe she’s guilty as sin.  I don’t know.

> Trump beat his wife, grabbed her hair and forcibly raped her.  And Hillary is worse?

Why no, actually.  Donald is a racist sexist pig and I certainly wouldn’t want to be a member of his household.  There are reports that Hillary’s mean streak is a mile wide, so maybe her household isn’t a nice place to be, either.  I don’t think I would want to have a beer with either of them.  But we were talking about which person would make better decisions as president.

> E-mail server? No crime there. If it were, Colin Powell would be under investiation.

You cannot conclude that something isn’t a crime just because a Republican is observed to get away with it.  Hillary’s private server was illegal, just like Colin’s.  But no one is claiming that Colin ran a deliberately-insecure server that allowed foreign governments to steal classified information.  Hillary’s two excuses for this behaviour are basically that she’s ”often confused” (≈ McCain’s “senior moment”?) and also she ”doesn’t know much about computers”.  Either of these excuses would explain why the server was insecure when originally set up, but neither explains why it stayed that way for four years.  Lots of people tried to get her to fix it, but she told them to never speak of the Secretary’s personal email server again.  This is not the behaviour of a person who doesn’t know much about computers and becomes concerned when someone tells her she’s using them wrong.  This is not a person having a brief senior moment and then coming to her senses when the next person brings up the same issue.  This is a Manchurian candidate who *wanted* the server to be insecure.  So who is she working for?  Maybe I’m naïve, but I just can’t imagine Hillary as a secret agent for Russia or China.  Maybe Saudi Arabia, but most likely Goldman Sachs.

Read more... )
pyesetz: (woof)
Most macros using this coon photo are lame, but this one seems better than many:

From what little I've heard about South Africa in recent years, the New Black Boss is just as corrupt as the Old White Boss.
pyesetz: (flag-over-sunrise)
Constable Andalib-Goortani has been charged with assault for beating up a protester whose name really is "Mr. Nobody".  No word on whether Andalib-Goortani has been jailed (probably not).  Looks like the police chief went too far when he accused the amateur videographer of doctoring the footage.  Well it turns out that the videographer is a web designer for a bank.  Hell hath no fury like a techie scorned!  Just so you know...
pyesetz: (Default)

To Rochester NY for more shopping!  And more shopping!  And even more shopping!!!  We went to the “Land’s End Inlet” which is actually a misnamed outlet store.  It was disappointing; many of our desired items were not on sale.  Then to Wegman’s grocery store to stock up on chicken and butter and other stuff that costs much more in Canada because they don’t abuse undocumented Hispanic serfs to keep their prices down.  When we visit the States, we usually return with more butchered chicken carcasses than is permitted for “personal use” importation, but they never search our car so we get away with it.

We were about to get back on the highway when I remembered that I had wanted to go to Wal*Mart to return a multifunction digital watch that BIL #1 had given me for Christmas.  I already have a digital watch and the gift watch’s face is too large for my taste.  But I couldn't return it at Wal*Mart Canada because the two companies have separate computer systems, so neither the UPC nor the code on the gift receipt would register there.  The Wal*Mart clerk in Rochester thought my story was a little hokey (and Christmas 2009 was a long time ago), but it helped that BIL #1 had sent watches to both me and Kid #2 and the clerk could see that Kid #2 was wearing his.  So she gave me an in-store credit and we went around buying stuff to use it up.

The New York Thruway offers public Wi-Fi at all rest stops.  That’s not so unusual these days but I hadn’t tried the other turnpikes.  To get on the Internet, you have to click past a landing page that asserts the right of the State of New York to monitor your activities and refuse service to anyone for any reason.  But they don’t ask for ID!  This shreds all the RIAA’s arguments that it should be considered a crime to have household Wi-Fi that isn’t protected by password.  Really, the only reason to restrict access to your home Wi-Fi is so that you can’t defend yourself against an RIAA lawsuit by claiming that the songs were downloaded by some random passer-by without your knowledge.  If they really cared about child porn, they wouldn't let you just show up at a rest area and download it without a trace.  But music takes too long to download so the RIAA doesn't care about rest areas, just libraries (where you have to show ID to surf the web).

The Thruway accepts Canadian currency at a steep discount of 10% off face value (the exchange rate would suggest a 6% discount) but they insist on giving change in American money.  The bridge into Canada accepts American money at face value but insists on giving change in the same currency.  So it seems to be impossible to leave the USA without some leftover American coinage in one’s pocket—the Good Lord knows I tried!

We arrived home to find that our second freezer was operating properly and was ready to receive all the chicken carcasses.  It had been malfunctioning for months.  The temperature control was broken and the cooling system just ran continuously, creating a −25°F environment that was too cold for ice cream.  I had taken the freezer to our local electrical shop for repair a couple of days before the trip, but the repairman had other things to do (like attend a funeral) so I didn’t get it back until the morning of our departure.

All’s well that ends!

(This completes the “Mass. Trip '10” series of posts.)

pyesetz: (fire-hunter)
We hypothesize that earnings management causes quadrophobia, the under-representation of the number four in the first post-decimal digit of EPS data.... Persistent quadrophobes are more likely to restate financials and to be sued in SEC proceedings alleging accounting violations.  Quadrophobia, even if itself legal, therefore appears to signal a propensity to engage in problematic accounting practices.

Our universe is chock-full of traces and signs that we haven't yet learned to interpret—there is so much more to do!  As the study's author told the Wall Street Journal, quadrophobia is “a leading indicator of a company that’s going to have an accounting issue.”  (Unfortunately this quote is apparently not available in the free area of the WSJ website).

Hat tip: Freakonomics
pyesetz: (Default)
I'm almost ready to talk about my 2007 tax nightmare (no, it still isn't resolved yet).  In the meantime, here are some strange words from Bill Harnsberger:

Barney Frank = New Bedford towel-snapping champ three years running.  Flicked a wart clean off a flea's ass from ten feet in a gale.  Blindfolded!

And here is Bill, channeling Bob Ross:

And we're almost done with our portrait of a teabagger rally on the mall.  We've done the Washington Monument, so tall and pointy.  And the capitol in the background, regal and grand.  Beautiful fall day.  Happy little clouds.  Perfect day for a rally...

Okay.  Next we'll take a dab of white, and reeeeal lightly—light like a feather, a little baby birdy feather—we'll just add in a tiny hint of froth around the corners of their mouths.  [dit dit dit dit dit dit]  There we go.  [dab dab dab]  Frothy frothy, like a vanilla milkshake.  Very nice.

And finally: we'll take the edge of our little trowel here and add a few protest signs.  Wouldn't be a protest rally without protest signs, would it?  Course not.  [skritch skreetch skritch skreetch]  Little signs. Some square, some rectangular.  Happy little signs.  They're just glad to be there, waving in the air under the sunshine.  And we'll just add a few little slogans on 'em, so people who look at our painting will know they're here protesting the federal deficit: "Obama equals Hitler", "Keep government out of my Medicare", "Beck/Palin 2012".  And maybe one more: "No Olgiharky, Morans"!  There we go.
pyesetz: (Default)
Go ahead!  Flag it!  I dare ya!  If I get banned, I'll just move to GreatestJournal.  You can't build a wall around free software!  (Thank you [ profile] brad.)
Explicit Adult Content:If you are a female furry, there is a greater than average chance that your body has PolyCystic Ovary Syndrome.  This syndrome causes insulin resistance (which makes you fat).  It also increases androgen levels, causing masculinization of the brain (e.g., an interest in games like D&D).  Worst of all, your ovaries have difficulty releasing eggs.  In order to make a baby, you might need to take noxious drugs like Clomid and have your boyfriend copulate with you on a strict schedule dictated by your doctor.  And if you want to know more about my sex life, just ask.
Offensive ContentFundagelical Christians are worshipping Satan, whom they call "Jesus".
Hate SpeechEveryone who voted for GW Bush in 2004 is an enemy of the free world.  On an unrelated note, Death to Infidels!
Illegal ActivityI would like to buy a lockpick, which is illegal in Canada.  Will anyone sell me one?  Also, I'd like some instruction on how to use them.
Nude Images of MinorsMy icon photo is of an unclothed dog.  All dogs are legally minors.
pyesetz: (fire-hunter)
Paul Krugman:
     [I]t’s true that Americans get hip replacements faster than Canadians. But there’s a funny thing about that example, which is used constantly as an argument for the superiority of private health insurance over a government-run system: the large majority of hip replacements in the United States are paid for by, um, Medicare.
     That’s right: the hip-replacement gap is actually a comparison of two government health insurance systems. American Medicare has shorter waits than Canadian Medicare (yes, that’s what they call their system) because it has more lavish funding — end of story. The alleged virtues of private insurance have nothing to do with it.

Of course, once I tell you that "hip-replacement surgery" is a Republican talking point, you should probably expect that it would actually prove the opposite of what they claim for it.  One of these days I'd like to look up some medieval Catholic text on the subject of how to detect that a person is working for the Devil.  Is there any sign of Satanic influence that the Bush administration *doesn't* display?
pyesetz: (Default)
Here is Representative Louise Slaughter, trying to explain why she personally did not use her power as Chair of the Rules Committee to stop the insanity.  Of course, Slaughter is a professional politician and her explanation contains a great many words, but this seems to be the meat:
With this White House, and with this Republican minority, it is safe to say that a standoff with the Administration would have meant that our troops would be left in harm's way, only now with even less funding to back them up. I don’t think that would have been right to do - to make them do even more with even less. The President doesn't seem to care how much our troops suffer. All evidence indicates that he will make them fight if they have needed funding or not.

In other words, she agreed to capitulate because our president is a sociopathic madman who is holding 180,000 American soldiers as hostages.  So, if that's what she thinks, why isn't she devoting every waking moment to pushing for his impeachment?  Doesn't her oath of office require her to use all available means to protect and defend the Constitution from all enemies, domestic and foreign?
pyesetz: (flag-over-sunrise)
On August 28th, at 4:59 PM, I received an email from my immigration lawyer: my request for permanent residence in Canada was approved!  All that remained was medical exams and updated police certificates.

At 5:05 PM that day, [ profile] stuffedwithfluf received a phone call from her doctor: the lump removed from her breast turned out to be malignant.  She needs radiation treatments and there was a 30% chance that chemo would be needed.  Also this makes her ineligible to enter Canada for five years.

Right now Wifey is under general anesthesia, having her lymph nodes examined to see if the cancer has metastasized.  Hopefully I can get this posted before the results arrive, in case the news will be bad.

So, 2½ years of fighting with the US government for the right to leave this "free" country, ½ a year getting an application together, a year waiting for Canada to decide to let me in, and now I'm "medically quarantined" in the USA for another five years.  I'll just mention "Book of Job" here without quoting from it.

It's hard to believe I'm quarantined in this loony-bin.  Recently President Bush said that it was unacceptable to think that the behavior of the US was in any way similar to that of Al Qaeda.  So the States are now a country in which there are officially-unacceptable thoughts.  The Bush government has admitted to spying on its own citizens without warrants, torturing them in Cuba and Syria, holding them indefinitely without charges, and in general acting like the former Soviet Union.  I studied the USSR in my youth; it was not a country I ever expected to find myself living in, and certainly I never expected that I would be medically prohibited from leaving such a place.

The health situation has sort of cooled my interest in getting another full-time job, since I may need to spend rather a lot of time over the next few months shuttling Wifey from one doctor's appointment to another.  I still have the job with 𝔾, but it doesn't pay enough even if I work at it for 40 hours a week.  And these last few weeks I haven't felt like working at it that much.

Update: Nope, didn't manage to post before the news arrived.  Her lymph nodes are clear.
pyesetz: (sozont)
His latest I Drew This has a lovely anthropomorphic tiger.  I especially like the cowlick in the latter two panels.  IDT is not to be confused with Simpson's other strip, Ozy and Millie, which is all-anthro all the time.
pyesetz: (Default)
This is the putz from Michelangelo's David.  SmartFilter is a firewall product that blocks access to pages with any likelihood of containing nudity.  If any post on your blog includes nakedness, all posts on your blog are blocked.  SmartFilter is the national firewall for several Arab countries, including the UAE.  In such places, attempting to bypass the filter can be punishable by imprisonment.  SmartFilter is also used as the corporate filter for certain businesses; bypassing it is grounds for termination.  Presumably Dubai Ports World (an arm of the UAE government which is scheduled to take over 21 US ports) is one of those businesses.

BoingBoing, the most popular blog in the world, is currently being blocked by SmartFilter.  The bloggers claim that only 0.65% of their last 692 posts include nudity (IMHO it's more like 5% that I have to quickly scroll past when surfing their site from work).  So now all 25,000 posts in their archive are forbidden to anyone stuck behind a SmartFilter firewall (and almost no one voluntarily chooses that firewall for themselves; it's always being imposed by others).  The good folks at BoingBoing ask everyone to post Michaelangelo's putz on their blogs, hoping that if enough of the world gets blocked that way then there'll be something of a backlash.  BoingBoing has succeeded with such memes in the past—just imagine having that kind of blogpower!

[persons with ADD should stop reading now, as all pretense towards topic-cohesion will now evaporate.]
  • What playing MMORPG's teaches us.
  • Pastor Dan's latest work is not *quite* a replacement for the vacationing Bill in Portland Maine. But remember, this quasi-lycanthrope is the main preacher for two(?) Congregational churches in Pennsylvania!
  • Another angry scientist link.
  • In this article (about Amory Lovins—what were his parents thinking when they named him?) I like the last three paragraphs, about the Musa acuminata plant that finds composted horse manure and then "goes bananas".  But how can Lovins say that it has lived for twice its expected lifetime if banana plants normally produce for 25 years and his house is only 23 years old?

*Update* On an unexpectedly-related note: today Comcast decided to ban all email coming from one of my company's mail-servers.  Only I and a few other holdouts are still using that one.  According this this blogger, Comcast's capricious blocking cannot be stopped except by shaming them in newspapers.  As you can imagine, I was nonplussed to receive a message stating "this IP has been blocked due to abuse" shortly after posting a message daring the governments of Arabia to block me!

*Update 2* The email address that Comcast provides for complaints about their blacklist doesn't work: messages to are returned User unknown!
pyesetz: (Default)
US law 109-162 was signed by President George Bush, between shots of Bushmill's single-malt to steady his nerves after all the coke he snorted the night before.  This bill includes a part labelled "SEC. 113" which provides for two years in federal prison if you annoy someone via an anonymous online post, thus proving that the entire top echelon of the US government are swastika-licking pig fuckers.  Present at the signing ceremony were Vice President Cheney (who paid Jeff Gannon to beat him up and have sex with him), Senator Rick Santorum (rapes stray dogs he finds in parks), and Judge Samuel Alito (being blackmailed by photos showing him in flagrante delicto with Harriet Myers).  Also attending was the omnipresent Karl Rove, who deserves to fry in the electric chair for outing Valerie Plame, but will probably "get off" with a slap on the wrist that he will find sexually exciting(Note to Secret Service: the imagined execution of Karl Rove mentioned above would be performed by official US agents carrying out a duly-pronounced sentence arising from his conviction by a jury in a court of law for the charge of treason under the Espionage Act of 1918.)  A law criminalizing all anonymous communications that "annoy" anyone would be perfectly reasonable in a dictatorship such as Singapore, but seems a bit out of place in the good ole' US of A.  Hey, what if it's a foreign national who's annoyed?  Lee Kuan Yew secretly pisses in elevators!

Hmm, what could this law be used for?  Perhaps John Seigenthaler (litigious nut) could have used it against the guy who annoyed him with an anonymous post at Wikipedia.  The miscreant, Brian Chase (surfs the web on company time) apologized to Seigenthaler in person and convinced him not to sue.  No no no!  We don't want fessing up, we want court cases, and lawyers' fees, and drama for our newspapers!  Making a federal felony out of it will ensure that future Brian Chases will not dare to fess up and ruin our fun.

I claim that my posts on this journal, unlike Chase's work at Wikipedia, are not "anonymous" as far as the government is concerned because my RL name is available via subpoena to LiveJournal.  And anyone can see from my userinfo that I use the email address; a subpoena to Comcast would obtain the name of the guy who's paying for that account (which would be me).  In a recent post, I said some things that could reasonably be expected to annoy Marshall Woods and Richard Concepcion.  It seems Woods has decided not to sue, but Concepcion has not yet made his views known.  Also, a certain someone made annoying (to Concepcion) comments on my journal, but her RL name is easily obtained by clicking on a link in her userinfo(gone now), so she's even less "anonymous" than I.  This law simply doesn't apply, so if I say "[ profile] mrcougar and [ profile] ka_crow are having an affair!!!", that's just regular old-fashioned libel.

109-162 is called the Violence Against Women and Department of Justice Reauthorization Act.  It basically adds "or via the Internet" to the text of the Telecommunications Act of 1934 that already bans annoying phone calls, especially those used for the sexual harassment of women.  Yes, George Bush is the Worst. President. Ever, but this law is not part of his mountain of evil.  Unfortunately for me, the good folks at BoingBoing have already debunked this anti-administration meme before I managed to write a post about it.  Edit: But see opposing view from, which is sticking to their original incendiary position.

Oh, and welcome to my asylum, [ profile] neonchameleon!


pyesetz: (Default)

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